Sunday, September 13, 2009


So I'm trying to get to the point where I feel completely at home here in Philadelphia. Almost there, but not totally. It should help when I get some furniture I suppose. Then I could invite people over. Get the social ball rolling.

It seems I still have an arm clinging to Los Angeles and can't quite let go. My head is still half hanging out in Pasadena and that might be keeping me from fully committing to here.

This weekend I didn't have any plans except for a trip to Ocean City, MD to see my sister-in-law on Saturday. (Yes that counts as plans, but it wasn't based in Philadelphia.) On friday I was originally planning to drive down to Maryland, but it was raining and gross so I waited. Here I was on Friday with nothing to do. Back in Pasadena I have a group of people I can call to do stuff with at the last minute. Here I have friends, but I am not sure where I stand with everyone yet. I don't want to be that pesky person who doesn't realize they are annoying. So I did nothing and waited for something.

It was weird. I've got my old high school / college friends in the suburbs, my illustrator / designer friends in the city and the new friends I have yet to make at grad school. Where do I fit in? This makes me feel all mushy and nervous. And I don't want to let go of my world in Pasadena. What to do? All these worlds.

I know it will all settle in and it is normal and it will be what it is supposed to be, but I am used to being the social organizer. I was comfortable in Los Angeles. Now I am uncomfortable. Exactly what I asked for. So I'll shut my yap and deal. Jeez.


Anonymous said...

Hey Martha~ Yeah...being here in Boston for just a little over two months, I know what you're going through. Most of the friends I do have up here are married and have their lives and I have a tendency sometimes not to plan anything...'Hey, let's do something now!' and i find myself alone. In NY, it was easy to find someone to do something.

Still learning the social thing here too. Well, if we lived closer, you would have a person to pal around with!

I hope you're doing well out thar!


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